Several large goldfish and an electrical monobrow.

Hello everyone. I shall dispense with the usual apologise and such, and get right down to the nitty gritty, and dish the dirt you all want to know.

A starfish is not a toy.

While on holiday in Jamaica, my sisters made the acquaintance of an unpleasant American teen (I forget the name...probably something like Cliff). He had bleached blonde hair, wore a necklace - the 'surfer' type. After doing ridiculous somersaults on the floating trampoline, while I watched with scorn, he mentioned to my sisters that he had found a starfish, and would they like to see it. Naturally, they agreed.

So he led his little expedition of my mother and sisters out a bit into the water, while I followed discreetly, allowing only my eyes above the water. He found his hapless quinteped victim, and plucked him out of the water, crowing with triumph. My sisters oohed and aahed, but my horror grew the longer this pimply faced ruffian held the poor creature in the air. I could almost hear it calling in pain, as the water rapidly evaporated from it.

However, this theatre of horrors did not end there. He offered to leave it on the beach, so it would dry up and die, and they could have it as an ornament. I was stunned, but luckily my sisters refused, as it was 'not nice'. He then remembered he had seen some stingray over somewhere else, so dropped his captive back into the ocean and swam off with my sisters.

Realising the danger it was now in, I decided to relocate my spiny little friend to a place where it would not be disturbed. I picked it up and swam (holding it under the water all the while) to a place further out. I panicked when my foot touched something slimy which I could feel moving, so I dropped it there and fled.

I can only hope it survived, and continues to...do whatever starfish do, safe from marauding American teens.

More rants another time.

Primary Decomposition Theorem

Just a random Maths theory I found.

I have just been looking at the syllabus for the final honour exams of the Oxford University Mathematics Degree - whew boyo:

"Dual spaces of finite-dimensional spaces; annihilators; the natural isomorphism between a space and its second dual; dual transformations and their matrix representation with respect to dual bases."

Just a brief, relatively simple sounding, excerpt from the Algebra syllabus.

Sounds fun, doesn't it?

I would really like to do Mathematics at Oxford, but I'm not sure if I'm good enough. I'm good at Maths, sure, but I only seem better than everyone else because I've read ahead. Hmm...

I have a theory (well, poached from one in a Discworld book, but I've dwelt on it):
Everybody has one Talent. One thing that they are really, naturally good at - that completes them as a person. Very few people find their talent - those that do, become famous in that field.

Being such a geek, I can currently think of only Mathematic Talenteers - Gauss, Euclid, Euler, Riemann.

The trouble with Talents is, few people ever try them - I think once you've tried your Talent, you know it's your talent. And some Talents may not have even been invented - like flying vehicles at hyperspeeds, or somesuch nonsense. I'd quite like to find my Talent. Heck, maybe it is Maths after all.

I was statistics browsing yesterday, being bored, and I was looking at the Times University Guide:

Oxford has been rated the top University in the UK.
York is the 7th overall, the best for teaching quality.
Cambridge is 1st for Mathematics (Oxford trails behind at 9th)
Sheffield is the number 1 university for studing Russian and East European languages.

Oh, and I have had a hair cut. It is very short (comparatively).

Last night, I watched the Passion of (the?) Christ. It was a very good film, though very bloody - not much more than showing how much Christ suffered. It was apalling - whether you believe he is the Messiah or not (I do not), no man - especially not one who's crime was no greater than telling people to love each other and not pay taxes - deserves that much suffering.

I wonder if Mel Gibson is a Christian.

Anyway, I'm off to figure out how to complete that thrice-damned Laplace transformation.

Put the following number into the form a+bi

Hello again.

It has been (2 weeks?) a while since I last blogged, so you would expect me to have a lot to say. Well, mayhaps I do - but a lot of it is far too personal for you (if it's not, you already know it), so nyerh.

I shall say it again.

Nyerh.

I have just finished my 3rd week at Kings School, and I am so far thoroughly enjoying it.
The teachers are (mostly) good, and the lessons (Maths, Economics, Religious Studies and History) are all interesting - hence why I chose them.

This has to be a short blog - for now - as my sister is haranguing me to get off.

This evening, I have been occupied with browsing the Oxford University website and its affiliates - all very interesting.

I would really really like to go to Oxford, but I probably won't be able to get it.

Still, I am reading the lecture notes given on the Maths Department website, so at least I'm getting a head start.

A more detailed blog when I have the time and the inclination.

Look behind you!

*runs away*

Missing teachers, Skittles in the canteen, and a lot of naked women...

OK, maybe not the women part. But try telling Andrew that!

There is a point to this post, aside from the shameless nudity - I have started the new school year at Kings School! (I am unsure on whether there should be an apostrophe there...I have seen both usages in equal amounts around the school, and the latin - schola regia - I just cannot figure out at all. schola regum, perhaps....

Wednesday:

My Dad dropped me off at school in the morning, as a special first day sort of thing - Kings was his old school, so he is practically hopping around with excitement now that I'm going there (at last). I found out my form room is actually on a different continent to the rest of the school, apparently as part of some fiendish plot to strengthen our calve muscles or something equally bizarre. I need to invest in one of those nippy little scooters. Most of the day was just sitting around in the form room doing not much, some of which I spent talking to Hannah, a girl who actually went to my old school, but I have no recollection of her. Doesn't really surprise me, though.

We also went to the Cathedral for a service, to dedicate the year, etc - it being a Christian school, and all. I'm not a Christian, but that doesn't exactly make me stand out...heck, half the boys there think they're God anyway, as Alex pointed out today. Except Nick - he actually is God. A long walk to the Cathedral, some bad singing (the first thing Hannah said to me when we stood up was 'You're a really bad singer') and then a long walk back to the school.

Uh...some other stuff....memory block...uh...cover it up with a funny joke!

What's funnier than a fish?

A dead fish!

Then we had a talk in the Hall about Wednesday afternoon activities - we're actually expected to use our time constructively! Crazy foreign ideas.

Um...went to Julia's....drank tea...home...food....sleep....blah blah, etc.

Thursday:

The first day of lessons at Kings! Excited? I wasn't. Well, maybe a bit.

I was picked up by Nick and his family in the morning, talked to Bob about murder in the Inland Revenue before beginning the trek to my form room. I lost two sherpas and a yak, but made it there just in time.
My memory is hazy, but I had Maths, Economics and Religious Studies.
Maths was quite dull, but Economics was quite good - I sat next to Julia, and in front of Jack and Stuart. We made paper fish, the point of which was - for my absent minded, but better, half - to understand how developing economies need to work together in order to develop, and the principles of mass production, imports and exports, economic survival...all neatly summed up in a paper fish and poncho.

Uh...memory gap...another joke!

What do you call a man with no arms or legs?

Whatever you want to!

I'm sorry, was that bad taste? I can never tell.

Uh...school...stuff...anyway!

Went back to Julia's...slept...

Friday:

Arrived at school bright and early, though with a slightly damp shirt.
More lessons, no frees. First History lesson in the afternoon - very dull, though I have learnt a surprising amount.
My bag is so heavy it has formed its own gravitational field. Ooh...nerdy joke there. Want another?

What do mathematicians do before they go to bed?

Put on their pi-jamas!

Anyway. School has been good, with my friends, made some new friends, could write more but I am bored, so I will sign off.

Bye!

An daring daylight robbery of Fort Knox on Elephant back?

That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard.

So...here we are again. How cosy. Just me, an empty mug, and this empty white screen glaring back at me, slaughtering my innocent rods and cones in their millions. Just listen to the screams. Hear them?

To try and stem the massacre, I will - because I'm such a noble guy - fill this screen with black writing, to shield the deadly white glare! Huzzah!

Well, I can see spots, better get started...

The extremely long Summer holidays are nearly over - just 4 more days off (including this one) before starting at my new school in Sixth Form - oh how different things will be. In a good way, hopefully.

I have begun my sporadic learning of Latin once again...I must try to stick with it this time. I would also like to try and learn Arabic. Thinking about it, I may try to find a good book (like my Latin self-teaching books, which are excellent). Books are so much easier to get along with than people. Julia's mother has kindly lent me one of her beginner's Kanji Dictionary (Japanese). Very interesting so far.

It is Sarah's 17th (!) birthday party on Monday night. We will be camping out at Sacrewell Farm, a place with many fond memories for myself (and hopefully for at least one other person...)

I have also offered to try and tackle an essay on Islam - the homework of a Sixth Former I (barely) know. Merely to try my hand before starting the course, I don't expect it to be anything like what the teachers are looking for.

Uh....other things...um....my main occupation as of late as been...well, Julia. And I'm sure she would not wish me to disclose such details to the ravenous internet audience. Sorry, fans.

However, while in her illustrious company, I did this personality test, and apparently I am an Idealist:

• Make sense of the world using inner values
• Focus on personal growth and the growth of others
• Think of themselves as bright, forgiving and curious
• May sometimes appear stubborn

Idealists put time and energy into developing personal values that they use as a guide through life. They may seek fulfilment by helping others improve themselves and often want to make the world a better place. Idealists only share their inner values with people they respect.

Idealists enjoy discussions about a wide range of topics, particularly those that deal with the future. They are typically easy-going and flexible, but if their values are challenged they may refuse to compromise.

In situations where they can’t use their talents or are unappreciated, Idealists may have trouble expressing themselves and withdraw. Under extreme stress, Idealists may become very critical of others, or lose confidence in their own ability to cope.

Recognition for their work is important to Idealists; however, they are also good at spotting false praise.

Turners Nook

I wrote a longer entry earlier but lost it, so I shall be brief and just state my GCSE results:

Maths A*
English Lit A
English Lang B
Science (Double) A* A*
History A*
Sociology A*
Business Studies A
Graphics D
French B
Religious Education A*

So, including my A* last year, that makes 7 A*s, 2 As, 2 Bs and a D for my GCSEs.

Also, I got an A in the Maths AS level.

One Minute Ago, Kyle Quit the Band...

Hello to all you robots, AIs, alien spies, and general web surfers.

As you may have noticed, I haven't updated for quite a while now, and I can offer no excuse. I am a bad person. So, to make up for this, instead of boring you with the (few) activities I've been up to the past few weeks, I will give you a collection of interesting links for your entertainment.

Interested in blackmailing George? Start digging here!

http://www.thenation.com/doc.mhtml?i=20040816&s=williams

Your worries about where to find the phone number of Cthulhu or what Nyarlathotep's favourite shampoo is are over at last!

http://www.cthuugle.com/

You think that light in the sky is the moon?

http://www.unexplained-mysteries.com/docsfbi.shtml

Your wait is over at last.

http://www.buildup.tv/bc/

Release some of that primal aggression by wiping out lives at the click of a mouse.

http://homokaasu.org/killeveryone/kill.gas

If you haven't seen these, you haven't lived.

http://www.explodingdog.com/

Before I forget - this should be your web home. Often you need never leave it to find information.

www.everything2.org

Death...he's just this guy, you know?

http://www.deathgetsawebsite.com/

Continuing the theme...any geek worth his salt has already seen this, of course.

http://www.sfdt.com/

Well, that's all for now folks.

Orion is a dirty word

Ahem.

I am at Julia's, and have just finished a cup of tea. And some chocolate digestives.

Type your body here.

In a few minutes, we are going to Tesco Metro to buy food and miscellaneous items for youth hostelling. We are meeting tomorrow at about half 8 at the train station, for any aspiring stalkers out there.

Tonight is the Jack Hunt prom, as I believe I have mentioned. To be honest, I am not really looking forward to it, for various reasons...

Anyway, we are off to read about the fascinating world of vitamins on www.everything2.com.

Have fun, y'all.

Upward facing dog.

Well howdy doody.

I have just had a delicious spaghetti bolognaise sauce, made my Mark. He's my semi/quasi/stepdad. Well, stepdad. But first things first.

Yesterday, today, and tomorrow (Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday for those of you too tired or drunk to figure out the current day) have been/will be my Induction days at Kings. This involves a mixture of a variety of talks on different aspects of the school, 'taster sessions' of my options - an outline of the syllabus and example material - and tomorrow, a BBQ! Will probably be disappointing, as most such things are, but hopefully the food will be good.
However, the major positive aspect of this is that it is my first taster of school life with my friends (including Julia). I could explain the friends thing (and I do have friends at my old school, several of whom are also going to Kings) but it is complicated and I don't even know who you are. You could my mother, nosing through the history. Hello Mum! Thanks for the Vitamin B!

But I digress.

I will now get to see Julia (and my friends) every day! This is a very positive (and slightly strange, but in a good way) thing. Also, she lives just round the corner from the school, so I can go back to hers after a school for a nice hot cup of tea (and if you think that's just an innuendo, you don't know either of us).

However, Kings is also a very good school in its own respects. The quality of the teaching seems much better, and the teachers much friendlier - though coming into it as a Sixth Former, where you are treated with more respect and intelligence than a Year 7, may help.
The pupils in general are also much friendlier. At Jack Hunt, there were quite a few nice (terrible word, must cut down) people. However, there were just as many complete and utter...um...nasty people. There seem to be very few at Kings, meaning I can act my confident and friendly self, as opposed to the shy and intimidated self (who is coming out less and less these days.
Anyway, so my peers are more...congenial.
The buildings are very different. I suppose it's about the same size, in terms of floor space, as Jack Hunt, but is a very different layout - two stories, for one thing. The buildings are much older and far more archaic - twists, turns, and knobbly bits all over the place. I am finding my way about surprisingly easily though. Like chewing a brick.

Also, in two days it is the end of Year 11 prom (for Jack Hunt). It should be quite good.

However, far more importantly, and to which I am looking forward to far more, is the youth hostelling trip, which I believe I have already mentioned. Julia is coming over on Thursday to help me pack - in my new hiking bag! I went with my Dad after school today to buy it - 65 litres. A tad bigger than I'd have liked, but the next size down was too small. Ho hum.

Dooby dooby doo....aah yes. I had Kung Fu this evening, which was exhausting, to say the least. The most intensive workout so far - I had to stop near the end and sit down in the fresh air because I did feel like I was about the throw up. Great stuff though - and I learnt an elbow strike, how to spar, and how to push someone to the floor easily. School tomorrow should be fun....

Anyway. I've been typing too long, my spine's hurting (I'm sitting cross-legged on the floor in my bedroom on the laptop) and I need an early night, to catch up.

So I bid you all a very fond farewell. Unless you're one of my enemies. You guys suck.

And in the Mulberry corner

www.pgdp.net
Distributed Proofreaders. An excellent internet project, which you will either find fascinating and addictive, or dull and repetitive. There's only one way to find out - sign up and try it!
It will help improve your grammar, as well.

I am at my father's now - Maxey Hall. Sounds grand, I think you'll agree. It is, contrary to the name, just a farmhouse, not especially big. It does, however, have quite a big garden...and a couple of fields (but I think one is actually a paddock. I don't know what the difference is, but I am too scared to find out.)

As I may have mentioned in my last post, Daniel stayed round last night (stayed, not slept...he was up the whole night watching baseball). I, of course, got a good night's sleep in my bed upstairs.
I just managed to catch Julia before she left for choir, and she came round a couple of hours later. We watched Men in Black II, and Alex came round a bit as well.
I got into some trouble, due to the irresistibleness (I know, dear) of Julia, but hey ho.

And I need to go now, to help my Dad move something, possibly house. Ha ha, I kid. Ahem. Wish me luck!

Oh dear...

Again, I am neglecting.
Please make me update.

I have just returned with Daniel from Poppy's - an end of exam leaving film thing.

Oh yes - exams have finished. Last one this morning (Sociology). Huzzah. It also means an end to my time at Jack Hunt - a transition fully completed by Induction Week at Kings, starting on Monday. I am looking forward to it.

Anyway. Poppy's. It was fun - we watched Seven and part of The Shining. I played the piano and table football, both terribly. Shocking, considering my absitence from the cider. I was, however, missing someone terribly.

I have decided on a plan to get into Oxford (you can't apply for Oxford and Cambridge in the same year, I have decided against Cambridge). I wish to study Mathematics, or a degree incorporating Mathematics, like Mathematics and Philosophy. However, bearing in mind how difficult it is to get a place, I have a plan - write a groundbreaking paper on some area of mathematics, thus showing my aptitude in an original manner. Swish.

In another hole...

It's me again. Sorry for the lack of posting the last couple of days, but I have been quite preoccupied.

On Saturday, I went to Sarah's.
To be more precise:
Nick came round in the morning.
We caught the bus - it was 12 minutes late.
On the bus already was Julia, Daniel, Alex, Haggis and Andrena.
We rode the bus to Oundle and met Sarah there.
I broke the umbrella.
I lost the spring.
Due to me staying behind to look for the spring, and Julia staying behind because I was, we arrived at Sarah's house later than the rest.
On arrival, we discovered Daniel had lost the other spring.
We had tea.
A roof was climbed.
We watched the Aristocats.
We went to the field.
Umm...ah!
I opened up a can of whup-ass.
We went to the hall.
Oh, it was Sarah's Mum's 40th.
There was a buffet.
And dancing.
I danced with some random girl. Lucky Julia wasn't there, else she would have been jealous.
We returned to the tent at about half 1.
...tents are fun.
Woke up after a brief amount of sleep.
Julia left early.
I stayed with Sarah, Nick, HAggis and Steg for a while.
Tartan universes are fun also.
I drank some tea.
Got home.
Went for supper with my family.
Went to sleep.
Woke up.
Went to my Graphics exam.
Came home.
Sorted through photos.
Went to my Business Studies exam.
Came home.
Rang McDonald's in Bretton.
Went to Julia's.
Revised Physics (alpha to omega).
Hem hem.
Came home.
Had cake.
Watched the Mighty Boosh.
Slept.
Woke up.
Drank tea.
Had a bath.
Looked at some photos.
Drank tea.
Rang Julia.
Drank tea.
Revised Sociology.
Started typing this.
Finished typing this.

The End of Time...

I have just returned from walking Julia home (through the crime ridden streets of Peterborough, no less). We attended the Petrus concert at the church - a wonderful performance. The first half was Dmitri's Piano Trio No.3, followed by an interval (free drinks!) and then the End of Time thing - a musical representation of part of the Book of Revelations. Both were stunning performances - very moving.
I walked Julia home, returned home, made myself tea, and Mum and Mark came back soon after - with a Doner Kebab! My first ever.
It's delicious. I can't believe I've never tried it before. Very nice.

Asparagus, lemon drops and dandelions

Credit for the random title goes to Julia.

Another day, another tuxedo measured. I went into town with Mark (my stepdad) earlier, to order it and get the measurements done. It's for my school prom, end of year 11 type thing. Since only Jack Hunt people are allowed to go, I am going alone...but I do, despite what some may believe, have friends at Jack Hunt, so a good time should still be had.
It is on the 1st of July. I will, however, need to get an early night, as I believe we are catching the train at some ungodly hour of the morning of the second, to somewhere in the Lake District.
I, with 7 of my friends, am going 'youth hostelling' for a week in the Lake District - just us, no parents or the like. It should be a lot of fun (and walking). I need money for food though...ah well, I'll eat Nick.
I'm not really sure what a youth hostel is like, having never been. I want to take a baseball bat, just in case, but I doubt I'll be allowed.
But I digress.
When I have finished this post, I am going to have a bath (Probably bathtime reading - A Field Guide to Demons and Devils) and after a spot of lunch, I am setting off for my beloathed school for my RE exam - two hours of CofE fun!
And after that, a quick jab at the doctor's, some supper, and then settling down on church pews for an hour and a half of Olivier Messiaen's Quartet for the End of Time - my mother is the secretary of Petrus (an organisation that sets up classical concerts in Peterborough), and I quite like classical music, so I'm going. It is apparently quite heavy going...but good company can make all things a pleasure.

Apologies....

Sorry for yet another post, but I forgot to mention it in the other 3...
I love Julia (astrojaxx).

In a similar vein....

So, the state of the world, as based on my (very) limited knowledge:

- There are countries
- These countries have people and leaders
- Some of these leaders are not very nice people
- Some leaders don't get along
- Some leaders lie to their people and kill lots of other people
- Some leaders lie to their people about doing the above
- There is an idiot and a sheep. The idiot wants to get rid of all the bad things in the world. Except the bad things which he likes. Or which he can't get rid of. Or which he can't remember the names of. He likes short, one word countries...anything like 'North Korea' is far too difficult.
- The idiot attacked a country to get rid of a nasty man who was killing a lot people. He killed a lot of people. The nasty man is gone, but lots of people are still being killed. Presumably, he anticipated this.
- A lot of people with a lot of guns are fighting over a small piece of land. Both of them need it, but neither can share. I think some sort of fence is being made.


As you can see, I'm not really much into current affairs. I like to look at the 'Big Picture'. History tends to repeat itself, anyway.
For example, the USA is the new Roman Empire - luxury, decadence, total military power, corruption - it has the lot. Therefore, it will soon crumble inwards, leaving a power vacuum which will mean a lot more fighting happens. Book your seats now, to the upcoming Struggle for Power!!! The front row is already taken by the Apocalypse Gang, so be sure to book now, before the other good seats are taken! Free nuclear warhead for the first 50 bookings! Popcorn available in the foyer!

However, I don't tend to think much about these type of things, and instead occupy myself with more important and relevant questions...like a use for 2^2^C outside of the number of subsets of 2^C, and what the hell 4/4 timing is.

Friars?

Oh, and as I forgot to mention in my previous post, I live in Peterborough, which is somewhere in the middleish-eastish of England. I have also just left Year 11 - the last compulsory year of education! Huzzah! I am, perhaps foolishly, carrying on though - at a different school, however.
It's a sweltering hot June, and we all know what that means! Exam time! I'm nearing the end of my GCSEs (General Certificate of Secondary Educations). Some have been tough - notably French and Business Studies - and some have been a piece of qualified pie - such as Maths and (I hope) English.
Today was my first Business Studies exam in the morning, and my second and last Maths in the afternoon. Business Studies was more difficult than I had anticipated - I doubt I'll see an A* there now. And apparently the toughest of the two exams is still to come.
Afterwards, I strolled up to the Fish and Chip shop with Mr Bullimore, to purchase some mid-exam sustenance. Finding it closed, we pulled ourselves together and went back to his house, where we discussed our film project some more, before walking back to the school, stopping off at the (now open) Chip shop and buying a chip butty. We discovered the fiendishly sharp edges of fried chips, adding more weight to my theory of a Universal Crime Syndiate of Friers (Not the fat guys in robes...those are Friars).
After resting in the Library and mocking Key Stage 3 practise papers, we went to the Sports Hall to factorise, functionise and...um...fart.
Maths was, as expected, as easy as a very easy thing on an especially relaxed day. I completed it too soon though, leaving me with about an hour of sitting around...during which I memorised Pi to 11 digits (3.14159265359) and generally pondered.
I am now home, listening to the chatter of the birds and some random song WinAmp has skipped onto. It's tripe though, so let me just skip on...ahah! The discordant symphonics of Eminem. He seems to have a stutter. Poor man.
And on that note, I'm leaving.

O frabjous day! Calloh! Callay!

Hello to everyone in Blog Land.

I have recently emigrated here from Parts Unknown, and will lurk around until such time as I am kicked out/burned/reduced to my component particles.

A bit about me, you say? Of course not, you'd have to be a loon to talk to your computer screen. But I'll tell you anyway:

Name :: Thomas Bloom
Age :: 15
Blood Group :: ???
Living Arrangements :: A room. With a bed.
Current Ambition :: Become a film-maker. Or director. Or writer. Hopefully all three.
Kung Fu Instructor :: N. J. Thompson
Love :: Julia
Date of Birth :: 08/07/88
Bones Broken :: None
Music :: Yes